Poker & Celebs Jokes
Here is the list of the best
Poker & Celebs related jokes we have heard, if you have
additional jokes
about poker & Celebs that are not listed here, please
send them to us and we shell include them as well.
Bill learns a Lesson in Poker
Bill Gates dies reaches
heaven. Saint Peter is there to greet him at the pearly
gates and says to him, "Bill since you're such a unique
person, we have decided to let you choose between heaven and
hell."
Bill takes a minute to think about it and wishes to have a
look at both options.
St. Peter says, "by all means, I have a pair of windows for
you to look through."
Saint Peter opens the window towards heaven Bill sees a lot
of angels on their clouds just sitting and plucking harps.
Saint Peter then proceeds and opens a second window showing
him hell. Bill sees a dazzlingly lit casino with a lot of
people all of them having a good time drinking and laughing,
in this amazing room bill sees naked girls almost everywhere
dancing on stages and in the far corner what seem to be a
great poker room, this room is filled with poker greats,
playing Bill's favorite $3-$6 Hold'em. Bill spots a vacant
seat long with game chips and everybody is waving him to
come and join them in the game. Bill turns to Saint Peter
and replies he made his choice, and that heaven seems boring
and he wants to join the poker game in hell. Saint Peter
grants his wish.
A few months later Saint Pete opens the window to hell to
find Bill shackled by the ankles, while hanging directly
over a fiery pit. Saint Peter asks Bill how does he like his
new home.
Bill answers crying, "Saint Peter, this isn't anything like
what you showed me! What happened?"
Saint Peter replies, "I'm sorry Bill, I thought that you
realized that was only the demo version".
The royal pear
Dolly Parton and
Queen Elizabeth died
on the very same
day. Both of them
were than faced
before an Angel,
waiting to take
their place in
Heaven. Regrettably,
on that particular
day a mere single
place was left in
the heavens, so it
was up to the Angel
to decide which of
these ladies gets to
join him in heaven.
The Angel decides to
ask Dolly Parton why
should she be
allowed to go to
Heaven, if there is
a special did or
anything special to
get her the desired
spot. Dolly without
a word takes off her
shirt and says to
the astonished
angel, "Look at this
pear, aren't they
the most perfectly
created, I'm certain
it will make God
happy to see them
every day, for
eternity."
The Angel than
proceed to ask Her
Majesty the queen
the very same
question.
The Queen reaches
into her purse and
takes out a bottle
of Perrier, picks it
up, and rinses her
royal throat. Then,
she spits it out
into the toilet and
gently pulls the
lever.
The Angel nod's his
head at her, and
says "OK, your royal
highness, you may
pass the gate and go
in."
Dolly, outraged and
mad and asks the
angel, "Why did you
do that? I showed
you this pear of
God's own most
wonderful creations
and you ignore it,
and refuse me? While
all she has to do is
spit into a toilet
and you immediately
send her in?! Do you
mind explaining that
to me?"
"I'm sorry, Dolly,"
the Angel replies,
"but even when
you're faced with
Heaven, a royal
flush beats a pair -
no matter how big
they are.
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